26 January 2012: Tribute to a loving father
Paul leaves behind a brother, a 7 year old son, a loving daughter from his first marriage, and many friends.
Paul sadly took his own life following a family law case which saw him being permanently excluded from his youngest son's life, he was not even awarded supervised contact.
His family and friends believe the case rested on the views of a biased cafcass officer.
To mark our respects, on Saturday at noon Real fathers for justice members and supporters will be holding a minute silence during the protest at Ken Clarke's house in Nottingham.
Paul's close friend Teresa said "It would make us so very proud to have a minutes silence held for him"
"We have made the decision to take action, as we all feel he was treated badly through the court case, although as I am sure you must know there are always 2 sides, but to not even be allowed to speak to your own son on the phone, or be allowed any form of contact in a supervised centre is beyond us all"
26 January 2012: Banned from seeing the grandchild I love:
Susan hasn't seen her granddaughter for 14 years. Her heartbreaking story will resonate with anyone who's felt the pain of family breakdown
Rffj say: When a child is denied contact to their father, they're also denied to one half of their family.
By Antonia Hoyle
Mail online
Looking out of the kitchen window, Susan Stamper let her mind wander to a time when the apple tree in her garden wasn't bare, but bright with blossom and the promise of spring.
One of her favourite memories flooded into focus. Annabel's chubby fingers scrabbled around a hole in the bark of the tree. 'Nanny, I've found it!' she squealed triumphantly as she pulled out an Easter egg.
The little girl flung her arms around her grandmother's shoulders, her tousled blonde hair tickling Susan's cheek as she buried her face in the curve of Annabel's neck. At three, she possessed the kind of unfettered curiosity peculiar to the very young. As they embraced, Susan's heart filled with hope as she envisaged the possibilities that lay ahead for her beloved granddaughter...
Susan Stamper and her son with his daughter in 1995. Since her Andrew separated from his partner Katie in July 1998, Susan has been denied all contact with the child
Susan Stamper and her son with his daughter in 1995. Since her Andrew separated from his partner Katie in July 1998, Susan has been denied all contact with the child
Then the memory faded as the joy it evoked turned once again to despair. Fourteen years had passed since that Easter Egg Hunt. Fourteen years in which Susan has been relegated to a footnote in Annabel's life. Since her son Andrew separated from his partner Katie in July 1998, Susan has been denied all contact.
Rffj say: When a child is denied contact to their father, they're also denied to one half of their family.
By Antonia Hoyle
Mail online
One of her favourite memories flooded into focus. Annabel's chubby fingers scrabbled around a hole in the bark of the tree. 'Nanny, I've found it!' she squealed triumphantly as she pulled out an Easter egg.
The little girl flung her arms around her grandmother's shoulders, her tousled blonde hair tickling Susan's cheek as she buried her face in the curve of Annabel's neck. At three, she possessed the kind of unfettered curiosity peculiar to the very young. As they embraced, Susan's heart filled with hope as she envisaged the possibilities that lay ahead for her beloved granddaughter...
Susan Stamper and her son with his daughter in 1995. Since her Andrew separated from his partner Katie in July 1998, Susan has been denied all contact with the child
Susan Stamper and her son with his daughter in 1995. Since her Andrew separated from his partner Katie in July 1998, Susan has been denied all contact with the child
Then the memory faded as the joy it evoked turned once again to despair. Fourteen years had passed since that Easter Egg Hunt. Fourteen years in which Susan has been relegated to a footnote in Annabel's life. Since her son Andrew separated from his partner Katie in July 1998, Susan has been denied all contact.
by Sabine Kurjo McNeill
>Link<
Thanks to Sabine for posting this and to Dawn Booth Lydon, Director of Communications UKFRM, for bringing this to our attention. My comments at the end - StuG
Camilla Cavendish’s 10-Point Plan
Camilla Cavendish[1] is Associate Editor and columnist at The Times. In 2009, she was campaigning journalist of the year for exposing miscarriages of justice which convinced Government to open the family courts – but not enough. Here is her 10-point plan that is waiting to be implemented:
1. Open family courts to the press in all but exceptional circumstances (as recommended by the Constitutional Affairs Select Committee)
2. Let any parent or carer accused of abuse call any witnesses they need in their defence. At the moment, they are routinely refused permission to do so.
3. Give automatic permission for parents who are refused legal aid to get a lay advisor to help them present their case. This is routinely refused.
4.Remove the restrictions that prevent families from talking about their case (as recommended by the Constitutional Affairs Select Committee).
5. Review the definition of "emotional abuse" across local authorities, to make sure that it cannot become a catch-all for overzealous officials.
6. Provide an automatic right for parents to receive copies of case conference notes and all evidence used against them in court, just as they would in a criminal trial.
7. Create an independent body to oversee the actions of social services, with proper sanctions. If that body is to be the General Social Care Council, make it easier for parents to go directly to that body rather than having to face delays from the local authority.
8. Let children in care waive their right to privacy, if they wish to speak out. For gagging children is surely not consistent with promoting their welfare.
9. Restructure CAFCASS, the Family Court Advisory Service, from being an organisation that reports on the parents to the courts to one that actively promotes the parenting needs of children. The primary focus should cease to be assisting the court process. It should be diverting parents away from contested hearings into the making of parenting plans.
10. Review the recent legal aid cutbacks that are deterring lawyers from taking on these complex family cases. It is quite wrong that desperate parents are unable to find a lawyer to help them in their time of need.
Among her articles are -
>Link<
Thanks to Sabine for posting this and to Dawn Booth Lydon, Director of Communications UKFRM, for bringing this to our attention. My comments at the end - StuG
Camilla Cavendish’s 10-Point Plan
1. Open family courts to the press in all but exceptional circumstances (as recommended by the Constitutional Affairs Select Committee)
2. Let any parent or carer accused of abuse call any witnesses they need in their defence. At the moment, they are routinely refused permission to do so.
3. Give automatic permission for parents who are refused legal aid to get a lay advisor to help them present their case. This is routinely refused.
4.Remove the restrictions that prevent families from talking about their case (as recommended by the Constitutional Affairs Select Committee).
5. Review the definition of "emotional abuse" across local authorities, to make sure that it cannot become a catch-all for overzealous officials.
6. Provide an automatic right for parents to receive copies of case conference notes and all evidence used against them in court, just as they would in a criminal trial.
7. Create an independent body to oversee the actions of social services, with proper sanctions. If that body is to be the General Social Care Council, make it easier for parents to go directly to that body rather than having to face delays from the local authority.
8. Let children in care waive their right to privacy, if they wish to speak out. For gagging children is surely not consistent with promoting their welfare.
9. Restructure CAFCASS, the Family Court Advisory Service, from being an organisation that reports on the parents to the courts to one that actively promotes the parenting needs of children. The primary focus should cease to be assisting the court process. It should be diverting parents away from contested hearings into the making of parenting plans.
10. Review the recent legal aid cutbacks that are deterring lawyers from taking on these complex family cases. It is quite wrong that desperate parents are unable to find a lawyer to help them in their time of need.
Among her articles are -
23 January 2012: Demo this Saturday
The demo will take place on: Saturday, 28 January 2012 from 10.30am.
Please attend if you can, there are offers of transport available if you email info@realfathersforjustice.org
173 MELTON ROAD,
WEST BRIDGFORD
NOTTINGHAM
NG2 6ER
>Link to Map<
Facebook event page >link<
20 January 2012: Anthony Douglas; the CAFCASS rot flushes down from the Top?
Article by Stu G
Those of you who attended the AGM last year will remember I spoke about Stephen Tonkmoor, a grandfather who had applied for contact to see his grandson and somehow ended up on the wrong side of a conviction for harassment. Last year, in November, he won his appeal. His conviction was quashed.
The story goes back to 2006 when Stephen's daughter split with her husband. Despite her child having a happy family home and local private schooling paid for by her grandfather, the CAFCASS Guardian, a Trevor Morgan, decided to recommend residence go to the father. Morgan had no idea where the father lived and conducted no residence check. When Stephen's daughter naturally objected, she found herself subjected to the usual treatment reserved for complainants - false CAFCASS allegations taken at face value by colluding court proceedings and at least one period of imprisonment.
When contact became difficult her father stepped in and made an application for contact to see his grandchild. Now, before the Government claims to support the rights of grandparents it should take careful note of what then happened to Mr Tonkmoor.
CAFCASS fabricated two false allegations to dissuade the court from allowing contact. One claimed that Mr Tonkmoor's daughter was psychologically damaged due to Mr Tonkmoor's treatment of an ex-wife, leading to her suicide. The other was to claim that, upon doing a background check, a local authority had recommended that contact between this grandfather and child was not a good idea.
The 67 year-old Mr Tonkmoor has been married and still is married to the same lady since they were teenagers. She is still quite alive and kicking. Demands by Mr Tonkmoor for CAFCASS to produce the local authority letter were refused. Eventually he contacted the two local authorities nearby to be told that they had never heard of him, his family or the child. The letter did not exist.
The story goes back to 2006 when Stephen's daughter split with her husband. Despite her child having a happy family home and local private schooling paid for by her grandfather, the CAFCASS Guardian, a Trevor Morgan, decided to recommend residence go to the father. Morgan had no idea where the father lived and conducted no residence check. When Stephen's daughter naturally objected, she found herself subjected to the usual treatment reserved for complainants - false CAFCASS allegations taken at face value by colluding court proceedings and at least one period of imprisonment.
When contact became difficult her father stepped in and made an application for contact to see his grandchild. Now, before the Government claims to support the rights of grandparents it should take careful note of what then happened to Mr Tonkmoor.
CAFCASS fabricated two false allegations to dissuade the court from allowing contact. One claimed that Mr Tonkmoor's daughter was psychologically damaged due to Mr Tonkmoor's treatment of an ex-wife, leading to her suicide. The other was to claim that, upon doing a background check, a local authority had recommended that contact between this grandfather and child was not a good idea.
The 67 year-old Mr Tonkmoor has been married and still is married to the same lady since they were teenagers. She is still quite alive and kicking. Demands by Mr Tonkmoor for CAFCASS to produce the local authority letter were refused. Eventually he contacted the two local authorities nearby to be told that they had never heard of him, his family or the child. The letter did not exist.
20 January 2012: Manchester meeting of Real Fathers For Justice, January 13th 2011
**Next Meeting 8pm Fri, 27/1/12**
Royal Arms, Liverpool Road
Cadishead, Manchester
M44 5BQ >Map<
Report by Drex.
A small but proven and dedicated group of fathers activists gathered at the Royal Arms in Irlam on this lucky day, Friday 13th, with the intent to relaunch the Manchester group that has been very active in the past.
The meeting was called and arranged by Wayne Massey, who has quite a few plans for future actions that would benefit from good support and a few eager hands on the decks as it were.. One coming up at the weekend, rumour has it! (Watch this space!)..
The venue was most adequate for the requirements of the group, notably, a large enough room to accommodate numbers that would conceivable attend even a national gathering of all activists in all fathers groups.. The banner was erected on the stage and business commenced when all expected folk where present.
The meeting was friendly and informal, a rough agenda was followed, based on seeing where the group could move on in the future.
The need for good communications was stressed, as it is important that activists keep themselves up to date with potential opportunities or developments in the group and especially the activists who have shown an interest locally.
It was agreed that future meetings would be held, and a few "opportunities for action" in the near future where suggested as worthy of more detailed investigation.
Royal Arms, Liverpool Road
Cadishead, Manchester
M44 5BQ >Map<
Report by Drex.
The meeting was called and arranged by Wayne Massey, who has quite a few plans for future actions that would benefit from good support and a few eager hands on the decks as it were.. One coming up at the weekend, rumour has it! (Watch this space!)..
The venue was most adequate for the requirements of the group, notably, a large enough room to accommodate numbers that would conceivable attend even a national gathering of all activists in all fathers groups.. The banner was erected on the stage and business commenced when all expected folk where present.
The meeting was friendly and informal, a rough agenda was followed, based on seeing where the group could move on in the future.
The need for good communications was stressed, as it is important that activists keep themselves up to date with potential opportunities or developments in the group and especially the activists who have shown an interest locally.
It was agreed that future meetings would be held, and a few "opportunities for action" in the near future where suggested as worthy of more detailed investigation.
19 January 2012: Why I’ll NEVER let my ex’s new girlfriend meet my son
Rffj say: At the time of writing, this article has attracted near a 1000 comments, overwhelmingly critical of the vile author's stance.
Until there is a level playing field in family law, the courts will pander to such unreasonable demands, as the best interest of the child is in reality the best interest of the primary carer.
It could be construed as insensitive to introduce a new partner to your child straight after a split, but the writer suggests that she would impose restrictions on contact even after they had married? This kind of controlling behaviour should have no place in modern society, nor should be backed up and condoned in family courts.
Mail online
By Kelly Rose Bradford
19th January 2012
Surely I can’t have been the only separated mother who felt great empathy for Elen Rivas after hearing about her Twitter row with Christine Bleakley over Christmas.
Rivas, who was in India at the time, claimed that her former partner Frank Lampard and his new fiancee would not allow her to talk to her two daughters on the phone.
In the end it turned out that Rivas had miscalculated the time difference and called in the middle of the night. However she has previously expressed upset that her girls now call their future step-mother ‘Mummy’.
As the mother of an eight-year-old boy, I know only too well how the thought of another woman ever being a ‘parent’ to your child leaves a very bitter taste in the mouth. And it is something I for one will never allow to happen.
My son’s father, from whom I separated three years ago, now has a new girlfriend. I made it perfectly clear to him from the moment he mentioned he was in a new relationship that my son was not to be part of it.
In fact, I phrased it slightly more bluntly. In an email which was ironing out other issues of access, maintenance, calendar synchronisation, school meetings and the 101 other things you suddenly have to deal with as separated parents, I added a terse line saying: ‘I do not want our son sharing his time with you with third parties.’
Until there is a level playing field in family law, the courts will pander to such unreasonable demands, as the best interest of the child is in reality the best interest of the primary carer.
It could be construed as insensitive to introduce a new partner to your child straight after a split, but the writer suggests that she would impose restrictions on contact even after they had married? This kind of controlling behaviour should have no place in modern society, nor should be backed up and condoned in family courts.
Mail online
By Kelly Rose Bradford
19th January 2012
Rivas, who was in India at the time, claimed that her former partner Frank Lampard and his new fiancee would not allow her to talk to her two daughters on the phone.
In the end it turned out that Rivas had miscalculated the time difference and called in the middle of the night. However she has previously expressed upset that her girls now call their future step-mother ‘Mummy’.
As the mother of an eight-year-old boy, I know only too well how the thought of another woman ever being a ‘parent’ to your child leaves a very bitter taste in the mouth. And it is something I for one will never allow to happen.
My son’s father, from whom I separated three years ago, now has a new girlfriend. I made it perfectly clear to him from the moment he mentioned he was in a new relationship that my son was not to be part of it.
In fact, I phrased it slightly more bluntly. In an email which was ironing out other issues of access, maintenance, calendar synchronisation, school meetings and the 101 other things you suddenly have to deal with as separated parents, I added a terse line saying: ‘I do not want our son sharing his time with you with third parties.’
14 January 2012: Cardiff council deputy leader McEvoy writes open letter calling for investigation into charities over fathers’ rights of access
Wales online
by Martin Shipton
Jan 14 2012
Cardiff council’s deputy leader Neil McEvoy has called for a full investigation into allegations that publicly-funded groups are helping women defy court orders and block fathers’ lawful rights of access to their children.
The move comes weeks after a major row in which Coun McEvoy was suspended temporarily by Plaid Cymru after accusing two women’s groups of committing “child abuse”.
In an open letter to the Children’s Commissioner for Wales, Keith Towler, Coun McEvoy writes: “I call on you now to initiate a commission or committee to look at how some of the third sector operates in the closed world of family breakdown, which involves children.
“The respected charity Families Need Fathers Both Parents Matter Cymru has confirmed that its clients claim that some third sector groups in Wales support mothers who are breaking court orders. Such groups are publicly-funded.
by Martin Shipton
Jan 14 2012
The move comes weeks after a major row in which Coun McEvoy was suspended temporarily by Plaid Cymru after accusing two women’s groups of committing “child abuse”.
In an open letter to the Children’s Commissioner for Wales, Keith Towler, Coun McEvoy writes: “I call on you now to initiate a commission or committee to look at how some of the third sector operates in the closed world of family breakdown, which involves children.
“The respected charity Families Need Fathers Both Parents Matter Cymru has confirmed that its clients claim that some third sector groups in Wales support mothers who are breaking court orders. Such groups are publicly-funded.
11 January 2012: Bristol meeting
Jeff is inviting former members of Bristol F4j and Rffj to a new venue in Bristol, initially for a social meet to catch up, then possibly to start holding regular campaign meetings again depending on support, new members and supporters are welcome.
When: 7pm, Wed 18th Jan 2012
Where: Commercial Rooms
43 Corn Street
Bristol,
Avon
BS1 1HT
>Link to map<
Contact Jeff via email: jeffskinner15@yahoo.co.uk
10 January 2012: Demo news
The demo will take place on: Saturday, 28 January 2012 from 10.30am.
173 MELTON ROAD,
WEST BRIDGFORD
NOTTINGHAM
NG2 6ER
>Link to Map<
Facebook event page >link<
